Showing posts from June, 2011

I am a Product

I can easily accept the truth about someone else, but the truth about ME—what a shock! Several years ago I attended a party at an ex-girlfriend's house. Another guest struck up a conversation with me, and as I talked with him, I noticed he looked like me. Not just a little; he could have been mistaken for my brother.  After speaking with him, I looked around the room and began noticing other men. They were exactly my height, my complexion, my profile, my eye and hair color. As this information seeped slowly into my brain, I heard someone ask the hostess, "How may ex-boyfriends do you expect tonight?" I needed this direct association to understand: the hostess was attracted to a type of man. I was that type, and so were my similar-looking companions. So was her fiance. If she broke up with him and dated a new guy, there was a good chance he'd look like the rest of the team. Recently I ran into someone who I hadn't known before, but turned out to be good friend

Greatest Hits: My Neighbor, The Vicar of Satan

Dear Readers, When I can't put out a new post, I'm drawing on some writing from a few years ago, before I put the blog on Blogspot.  One night in 1993, I walked out of my Richmond District apartment and went to the nearest grocery store. Scanning the shelves of canned vegetables, my head swung to the right. My eyes rested on the bald head of an older man. A warmth came over me; my father was bald, so older bald men reminded me of him. In a couple of seconds, I realized that this wasn’t just any old bald guy. I was standing next to Anton LaVey, founder of  The Church of Satan .  We didn’t talk, but I stood in line behind LaVey and his girlfriend, Blanche Barton. Anton ducked out of line to get ice cream as Blanche approached the register. They both looked happy, and LaVey’s face was most unusual; scary and charming at once. That’s what I love about San Francisco: you can walk out for lima beans and run into the Anti-Christ. Later I read several books by and about Anton LaVe

Dating and Learning

Single life didn't thrill me, generally. For better and for worse, I am made for marriage. When I was single, I joined an internet dating site. A female friend told me about the site, and I'm grateful to her for all the experiences I had, meeting women I'd never encounter independently. I had the good sense to interview female friends who used the site, and find out what they liked to see in the male profiles. I tailored my own profile to their comments, and I was off to the races.  I received good results. I could go out and meet a new girl several times a week, if I wanted. These first dates were like job interviews. Going through many of them, I gained broader knowledge of the general female population [I needed this]. I also learned to set up rules for sorting people out.  Volume was crucial to help me learn. Meeting an attractive woman paralyzed my brain. The only way to calm down was to do it over and over again, until my nerves got tired of reacting and I could

Heroes: Robert Greene

Robert Greene [left] with rapper and entrepreneur Curtis Jackson, stage name 50 Cent   It is to him who understands the world—not to those who disfigure it—that we owe our reverence. —Voltaire Conflict is a constant irritation in life. We feel conflict between our ideas and what actually happens, conflict between what we want and our abilities, and of course conflict with our enemies. I prefer to avoid confrontation, and I dream of a position that would protect me from all conflict. This does not appear to exist, however. In fact, the more success I have achieved, the more conflict has entered my life. I did not prepare well for conflict, growing up. No one told me when and how to fight. If fighting is not advantageous, what exactly to do? These questions influenced my most important needs and wants: making a living and attracting women—seduction being a form of conflict. Now I have a family, and I could describe every minute of my day as a battle.  Four years ago I discovered t